You know it

Disclaimer: The opinions expressed here are of the author's self reflection and are not directed at any particular individual. Read it with an open mind.

Come on, let's be true to our self. Do you really believe that humans are altruistic by nature? While I do agree that sometimes actions are spurred out of goodwill, but if I were to measure the occurrence of that against a action motivated by other motives, then I could write a 5k report on that.

I am not being a pessimist here, just being real to myself. I am sure there are people who are willing to sacrifice themselves for the welfare of others, or someone they care. But I can only think of one type of people: Parents.

I don't know about others, but my parents would go all out for me. I would do the same for them too. In a way, they give me my life, they created me. I think I would be forever in debt to them, for the pain and sufferings they bore in order to have me. We are blood-related, so it is only natural that I would do everything for them.

We behave differently towards a family kin and a stranger, although I am sure some of you looked at them as equals, for the better or worst. What would I say towards a stranger then? I am sure most of us have donated notes or loose coins to charity cans in the public or helped an elderly crossed the road. But I guess that's the limit we would go for a stranger. The act is directed one way, one from the giving end and one from the receiving. Usually, we expect no returns from doing something out of goodwill. So why should we do anything more? It doesn't benefit me in anyway else, does it?

That limit is set based on the difficulty level, duration and effort required by self to complete that task. For example, it is easy to give up your seat on a public transportation. It is a quick process and doesn't require too much effort from me. So since the task is within my limit, I would then give up my seat. But things change on days you feel tired and just want to nap on the train. In this case, the effort from you is much higher than other days when you feel fresher. Hence, the outcome would go back to how high or low your limit is.

Beyond that limit of goodwill, I see it as a form of business transaction. An exchange is performed because I have something you want and you have something I need. Hence, we do an exchange for the best of both worlds. On the contrary to goodwill, business transaction benefits both parties. Every financial transaction takes place because the task is well beyond their limits and our limits. For instance, getting a haircut would benefit me, and if every hair get their hair cut, then the entire population would look great and presentable. However, from a hair stylist point of view, providing free hair to one or two people might seem acceptable, but why I should I cut everybody's hair for free? It is beyond the stylist's limit. Which is why a monetary exchange needs to be conducted in order to benefit the stylist. And this applies to all other business transactions.  

Do you agree with me? I don't know why I am blogging about this. Probably it is just random babbling that sprouted out of nothing after take a break from studying. I am not judging anyone, just purely doing a self-reflection.

Hunger games

Last night, I caught the movie, Hunger Games, with the boy. It was a movie with so much hype going on even before the movie was aired. I remember the first time I saw the trailer in the theatre, and immediately I booked the boy for a movie date to watch it. It is impossible to deny that the female lead was an eye candy, and the content itself was so fresh and unique in the movie industry, although it did remind me so much of Battle Royale. But overall, it was a very enjoyable movie. I love movies, especially those that set me thinking. And Hunger Games was one of them.

Here's the trailer if you haven't watch it.

*Spoiler Alert*


By watching the trailer itself, one would have known that it was a survivor movie filled with actions and love. All movies revolve around the theme of love. It's inevitable. Sadism was another clear theme. The Hunger Games served as a punishment and a reminder to warn people against rebelling. The game was being telecast across the country like a TV show. What triggers my thoughts was seeing how the metropolitans, or people from the Capitol, would so much desire to watch people kill each other in order to survive. People living in the Capitol worn outfits like clown as their own fashion novelty. Clothed in outrageous striking colours with make-up as thick as clay for both men and women have comfortably legitimised Shakespeare famous words, "All the world's a stage, And all the men and women merely players." I couldn't help but to joke with the boy that how make-up remover would have been sought for as a necessity in their world.


A few minutes into the games, I told the boy that I would die within a day if I were put to into their battlefield. The boy delightfully replied, " I would just surrender." Hahaha.


I, on the other hand, wished the game did have to go on. It was quite a sight to watch young teenagers being forced to kill one another or be killed. I teared when Rue died. She was such a sweetheart. I was rooting for Katniss all the way, hoping that she would survive the massacre. It was at this very point that the truth hit on me. If I wanted Katniss to win, that would have also infer that all the rest of the "tributes" must die. Then how I am any different from those crazy clowns from the Capitol who betted on the winner? I became one of them, the only difference is that I am watching them watching the Hunger Games. It's like inception. How ironic was that?


What came across your mind? Did you support Katniss like I did?

The tributes were like chess pieces. Those people in the Capitol had the power to alter the landscape of the battleground. Who are they to decide the life or death of those tributes? One thing for sure, Hunger Games left a deep impact in my head. I hated that augmented ferocious bear they planted into the forest. I had the shock of my life when the bears jumped into my face out of the dark. The boy and I was sitting on the third row seats from the front. The bears almost kissed me. The impact lingered. At night, I dreamt of a black bear
attacking my city and everyone went mad. Fortunately, the bear was extremely afraid of the heat from the sun and we had the chance to escape.


At the very end, I asked the boy again, if we were the two last survivors and one had to die, who should live?. He replied conveniently, "Me." Surprised by his answer as to why didn't he want me to live instead,  I questioned him for a answer. Then he said, " Because you ignored me when Rue died."

-.-


HELLO! Of course ignore you lah! Katniss was doing a simple burial ceremony for Rue and I was crying. It was rude to interrupt the ceremony! HUH!. When Katniss did that kiss on the hand and raise three fingers up into the air, I almost followed, even thought I don't really know what it represented. I just felt so sad. ;(


There are many things I want need to do after my exams. But the topmost important item on board now is to PLAY THE RPG VERSION OF THE HUNGER GAMES.


Happy Hunger Games, and may the odds be ever in your favor.

211212

According to the Mayans (in MacDonald, 2007), the world will end on the 21st December 2012.

Reference list
MacDonald, G. J. (2007, March). Does Maya calendar predict 2012 apocalypse? USA Today. Retrieved March 26, 2012, from http://www.usatoday.com/tech/science/2007-03-27-maya-2012_n.htm.

This is what happens why you use too much APA referencing in your school work. You continue to use APA when blogging. I can't indent the second line because Blogger doesn't allow me to.

That aside, if their predictions are true, you have less than 9 month till the arrival of the doom's day. And sadly, it is 1 day before my birthday. In other words, I might not be able to blow my 24 candles at once this year. =( What if doom's day really come true? What will you take with you when you are running for your life? I made a mental note for myself:

1) Bring baby rabbit. HIGHEST PRIORITY.
2) Wear covered shoes. Not heels because I need to run.

Money and everything else are worthless already.

So drop all your worries today and live like there's no tomorrow!

Which is why I shall not do my marketing report tonight and head straight to bed! YAY!

Seems legit.

Okay I got slightly depressed and decided to hug my parents before crashing.

Goodnight.

One less day on Earth. 0_0

Dream

I had such a dramatic dream last night that I felt as if I have watched a Hollywood movie. Hahaha

First, I was prepared to die on 22 December, my birthday. I had to fight against mummys who were awakened by the bad guy, my uncle! There were lots of obstacle course that required my team to climb, crawl, jump, ran etc. We had to travel by raft on the water in order to reach my uncle's base. Along the way, I was almost killed by snakes. But luckily my army saved me. After surviving from all the attacks, we have reached our last station; five of us (my army) to fight against my uncle like a wizard! LIKE HARRY POTTER! I remembered I was holding on to a golden wand, while the rest had normal wooden ones. And I think my uncle was holding a elder wand. 0_0

I became rather depressed because it seemed impossible to defeat him. It was like fighting against Voldermort when I'm not even Harry Potter to begin with. Maybe just Hermione Granger. HAHAHA.

We entered the battlefield, all ready to cast spells on each other. Suddenly,

OKAY....

End of dream. :(

I tried to continue with the same dream, but I couldn't. I remembered I managed to continue with one of my dreams before when I was a young girl. Some of the dreams recurred a couple of times in the past, but not any more.

I wished I could see it till the end! :( I was so eager to know the ending. Aiyaya.

*Please help me click on the advertisement banner on top! Thank you.*

The boy

Have you ever realised that the people or person whom you flare up most frequently at, are actually the ones who envelop you with their utmost love? You can snapped at them, shout, throw tantrum and do all sorts of funny things to hurt them. But they would never stop loving you.

There are exactly 3 victims in my life: My dad, my mom, and the boyfriend.

My parents are awesome people. The funniest, most down to earth and accommodating couple I have ever seen. Once in a while, I do see sparks go off between them. But I will hear them laughing within the next few minutes. It is incredible.

What appears to be more amazing is how a person who is totally unrelated to you, can commit his life into making yours a good one. That is my boyfriend.

Sometimes I think I am a really good catch. Pretty face, quite smart and has a commendable character. Hence I deserve someone who stands on par with me. But on most days, I feel I am just any other normal girl with nothing really special about me. Pretty? I looked pretty with make up and all girls with make-up looked pretty these days. Smart? The whole street are filled with intellectuals with papers and qualifications that make mine look like a kindergarten graduation certificate. Good character? Most girls are generally kind-hearted since the day they were born.

Beside being an average Jane, I have no money. Every month I struggle to pay off my school fees, insurance and phone bills that on some days I survive with coins. I am short, shorter than most Asian girls. My body shape aren't really alluring -.-  Nothing like Megan Fox or Angelina Jolie's.

So why do you love me, Malcolm Teo?

Writing this post put tears in my eyes.

You, on the other hand, are much wealthier than me. But you continue to work hard anyway to earn your own income.You would pay for my meals, plant notes into my wallet and fetch me across Singapore even if you were tired. You have excellent communication skills that would make you a perfect sales person. You always amuse me when we entered a random shop, you could pick up a random product and begin "selling" to me. Bombing me with the goods of the product which you made up on the spot. I always wonder if you secretly worked part time in those shops.

You are 1 year older than me, that makes you 25 this year. But you never act like a quarter century old adult, especially at home. The way you sleep, the way you played with Brownie, the way you sang songs and went out of tune all the time which set both of us laughing. The way you hug your little toe and land on the bed when you hit it against the bed frame, the way you look at yourself like an idol when styling your hair, and so much more. Sometimes when I am alone by myself and I recall those silly things that you did, I can't help but to laugh sheepishly to myself.

Did I mention how much I enjoy those moments you play guitar and the keyboard, although most of the time you would only play your signature piece of "Right Here Waiting"? I love how you could piece random notes together and make them sound so pleasant to the ears. It was beautiful.

Most importantly, you made me think for myself. Your words can be so intriguing that it set my mind thinking about what you said. You changed me into a better person, eliminating my weaknesses and built on my strengths. I can be really crazy in one minute and totally loving the next moment. But you embraced that. When I get too emotional and start sobbing non-stop, your body warm and touch can calm me down magically. The only man in this world who had made me cry the most is you. I have lost count of the number of occasions I exploded at you. But you forgive me every single time.

There are so many so many good points that I can write a book about you. At times I feel like I can't match you because you are too good. I writing this post because I know I wouldn't be able to be the perfect girlfriend with the best character, but I will try. Because you deserve the best, and I want to be your best.

I love you, Malcolm Teo.

Alive

What am I fighting hard for?

When I needed someone to talk to, my ego suppressed my lips so tight I turned into a mute overnight. I had to belittled my exterior self just to speak a few words. But little did I realised that I have let my guard down too low, only to have my pride being trampled over. It was probably just my wishful thinking that I could still drop my armour and be exposed to the world without getting hurt.

Not any more.

What is Happiness?

Enjoy the process of gaining, losing and even sufferings, for they help to shape a better you.

Dedicated to Papa heng.

Happy birthday lao pa!

BUSY

Hello darlings!

Miss Heng has been so busy recently. I have been juggling my time between studies, work, families and friends, and making sure the cycle is in equilibrium. I can't afford to let any "balls" slip off my hands or my life will be in chaos. To my pleasant surprise, I am still handling them quite well.

Right now, my top priority goes to my academic course. Forking out so much money to fund the course, I want to squeeze out as much benefits and knowledge as possible from the modules. Likewise, I make sure I put in effort and hard work to achieve satisfactory grades. Fortunately, I haven't let myself down. To share a couple of good news, I scored 19/20 for one of my 1800 words individual report (this is impossibly high) and 13.5/15 for my accounting test. I was overwhelmed with joy!

My family has been very supportive of me. When I told my parents about my results, I could see their faces light up. Nothing beats having your parents being proud of you. I love you papa mama! And Mr boyfriend has been really thoughtful and understanding during this period of time. As my schedule becomes really tight, we tend to meet less frequently. Hence, I cherish the time every time I see him, be it just an hour of lunch date. When he knew that I had a long day after school and work (tuition/photo shoot), he would offer to fetch me home so that I have more time to rest. Thank you baobe!

Sleeping early has become a reward. It is no longer a daily routine to go to bed fore 12am. A couple of times, I owl-ed through the entire night just to make sure my report is solid enough for submission. After that, I washed up and prepared myself for school at 9am. My day didn't end at 12pm. I was scheduled for tuition at 7pm. And the cycle continued.

Sure enough, I lost plenty of weight.When I weighed myself yesterday, I was 41kg. HAHAHA. So girls, if you want to lose weight, forget about dieting or putting braces. Sign yourself up for MBA. It works.  

But at the end of the day, I feel more accomplished. While I sleep lesser and have more things to do, I feel that I am fully utilising my time and not wasting a single second. I never regret setting my foot on this path.

The road is still long but I can almost see the destination already. Persevere people!

Photo credits to Mike aka Candleghost.

ADV: You no love flea??

HEEEYAH!

I love fleas! Everything there is incredibly cheap and good. For vendors, it is a great way to clear your pre-loved and earn some quick cash. =)

Fleanatic is organizing a flea market March and if you want to rent a booth, check out the details below:

Venue: Pasir Ris Sports and Recreation Centre (next to Pasir Ris Interchange)
Date: 24^th March 2012 from 2:00pm to 8:00pm

      Rental: $50/booth, with one 3ft x 3ft table and two Chair
(Additional chair available @ $2 each)Total stall space of 5ft x 5ft

Note: Vendors may opt bring 2 clothing racks instead of using the table provided

Besides expecting the normal family crowd at the venue, there will be a lot more visitors on that day as the National Cheerleading Championships 2012 will also be held on the same date at the Sports and Recreation Centre! So there's no need to worry about no crowd.

If you are interest to register for a booth, just fill up the application on their facebook page or website.  If you have any queries, please contact Francis at 96308587 or Hehehe.email francis.fleanatic@gmail.com.

*For more information please visit:

Website:                     http://thefleanatic.webs.com/
Facebook page:         www.facebook.com/fleanatic

If you do not want to participate as a vendor, you are still very welcome to visit the flea because you stand a chance to win prizes with every $50 spent! ^-^

(PS: Please remember to like their facebook page and join them on twitter: @fleanatic !)

Happy Flea-ing!

Abrupt end with my face.

Selling iPhone 4S without contract

Selling brand new iPhone 4s in 16G or 32G, without contract. This is a closed bidding. So send your bids to sereneheng@live.com

Highest bidder wins!

Kids

No matter how old we grow, remember to keep the child in you alive.

6 year old Iness's impression of me and herself 

I started giving tuition classes in December again so that I would be able to generate a minimal sum of revenue at the end of each month. As you know, my school fees itself can murder me without leaving any traces. I can't afford to study full-time with zero income every month. While I have sufficient to substantiate the fees, I am very unwilling to cash out my savings in the bank. After all, it was my 2011 resolution to save up that sum of money. I don't want to see my bubble burst. So, I am trying at my best to earn as much every month to pay off the fees by instalment. At the same time, I also want to make sure I do not jeopardize my studies for money.

Vinss and his Mr Rabbit

I am currently teaching a Primary 1 girl and her Kindergarten 2 brother. They have a mix heritage of half Indian and half Chinese. Living in one of the private units in Six Avenue, they enjoy the company of their little sister and a full-time housewife mother.

Mr Rabbit

To me, they are not just my tuition kids. I see them as another pair of niece and nephew that I have. Sometimes, their innocence really awe me and warm my heart. Once, I gave them some stickers and allowed them to choose one. I thought for sure they would pick the biggest and most colourful piece. But I was utterly wrong. Amongst the vast designs of car stickers, the little boy went for a simple directional arrow sticker which was a lot smaller and less ordinary. It makes me reflect upon myself on whether or not I have been blinded by pragmatism that my sight has always been set on the more prominent and outstanding goods in life that I failed to appreciate the goodness of simplicity. Maybe I did.

Be thankful for everything that you have, both the goods and the bad, and life would be a lot more fulfilling. 

Please help me click on the advertisement above! Thank you.

2 months

Jesus Christ comic strip
I am a buddhist, but this strip warm my heart a little. So I thought I would just share it here.

In a week's time, we shall bid goodbye to two months worth of time in 2012. So, what have you achieved so far?

While I haven't been the most successful person (yet) in terms of the multiple roles I hold, I can safely proclaim that I am a "sharper" person now. There is a saying in Chinese, "玉不琢， 不成器。人不学 ，不知道。” It literally means that you need to polish a jade in order to make it shine. And if one does not learn, he or she will never know. 

Going to school for my MBA course in PSB academy has changed my perspectives and my lifestyle to a large extent. When I was still attending classes in NUS, my objective was to clear all my modules and graduate with a Degree at the end of three years. After working for a year in RWS and eventually going back to studying again, I realised I have totally wasted my time in the university. Surely,  I have enjoyed my Communication and New Media course, but how much have I benefited from it? 

I have been so obsessed with the outcome of my education. I was too focused at the finishing line that I failed to appreciate the journey of my run. What should have been more important to me would be the process of learning, not the end. I heard people saying this over and over again. But I haven't truly grasp the meaning of it until now. You need to experience it personally in order to apprehend the essence of the wise words that old people always say. Now I know why academic authors like to quote the "elders" in their articles. Because really, elder people know so much more than us. But we are just too block-headed to be grateful to them. Most of the time, we just dismiss them casually or acknowledge them plainly by nodding our heads, PRETENDING THAT WE UNDERSTOOD. Didn't you?

I signed myself up for the MBA course because I want to learn knowledge and skills that would be beneficial to me when I stepped into the corporate world in the future. Of course, having a Master Degree does make my resume look better. But what I am more interested in, is how the course will make me a better person. 

So, before I end this entry and start working on my projects and assignments, remember to take some time to appreciate small little things around you everyday. Take care people.

P.S Did I mention I only have $1.33 left in my bank now thanks to my school fees? But so what? Just be happy!

Please help me click on the advertisement at the top! Thank you.

Luxury

Two days ago,

I enjoyed the luxury of watching 1 full hour of TV program without any interruptions and turning in to bed at 10pm, only to wake up at 7am the next morning. These two activities have been out of my life since I started school. Watching TV program is really quite therapeutic for me. For a hour, I could take my mind off every issues that were stucked inside my head. Even for tonight, I still have some time to type out an entry. How privileged was that. But on the hindsight, I will have a lot of (uncountable) assignments and projects due in the coming week.

It's another quiet night by myself.

Read it

-----
Written by Adrian Tan, author of The Teenage Textbook (1988), was the guest-of-honour at a recent NTU convocation ceremony. This was his speech to the graduating class of 2008.
-----

I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your convocation address. It’s a wonderful honour and a privilege for me to speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by practising at home during conversations between her and me.

On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when you’ve already won her heart, you don’t need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end of education. You’re done learning.

You’ve probably been told the big lie that “Learning is a lifelong process” and that therefore you will continue studying and taking masters’ degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don’t you think there is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to be repeat customers.

The good news is that they’re wrong.

The bad news is that you don’t need further education because your entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of you. You’re in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life expectancy.

I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean the average life span of a group of people. But I’m here to talk about a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There’s very little danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you’ll have another 40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they’re 50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn’t meet their life expectancy.

I’m here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it’s calculated based on an average. And you never, ever want to expect being average.

Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working, falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be an awful waste.

If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them. And you don’t need years of education by the best minds in Singapore to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life’s a mess. You are not entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don’t expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term “Karoshi”, which means death from overwork. That’s the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day, bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there’s nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There’s a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are “making a living”. No, they’re not. They’re dying, frittering away their fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan “Arbeit macht frei” was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps. Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.

Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy it and I would do it for free. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve been in some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don’t imagine you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I’ll go further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you don’t, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I’m not asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be hated.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused, murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it’s often the case that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one’s own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise. Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance. It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning, attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.
You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone.

Yogurt

Since the first day of school, I have always been very uptight and really stressed up for school work. Sure, I have completed my degree and worked for a year. Gained valuable experiences and insights that have changed my perspective on how he corporate world works. But nothing's quite the same with my MBA at PSB Academy course now. I used to take 5 modules in NUS and I thought that was manageable. Now I am doing just 4 modules and god, I am stretched like a rubberband. The classes aren't intensive per se. It is the self-study and projects and reports and tests that can make your eyes spin. Datelines for different subjects are all glued together. And I start to wonder why they are never ending.

The boyfriend suffered my wrath at its worst. I am sorry bao! =p Luckily, he was very understanding and stood cleared of my war path. Instead of trying to calm me down (which he did before and got bruised by me), he decided to just let me do what I wanted and but following behind me closely, lest I lost my mind any time.

It was until yesterday that my body gave a red warning signal. I always have problems with my gastrointestinal track and irregular eating habits make started a tornado inside my body. I hadn't been eating well because my workload was too packed. It was a extremely bad excuse not having time for eating. Simply put, I was bad at time management. In order to make up for the time I have lost and catch up with the deadlines, I skipped meals to complete my assignments. I have lost weight noticeably, but this isn't how it should be.

I have always been told that health comes before anything else. I know the line but it has always been just another wise sentence that someone said. But today, I felt I truly understood its meaning now. It's like a sudden revelation.

While I was going over to my tuition kid house, my bus passed by Holland Village. At the spur of moment, I decided to hop down the bus and get myself a cup of yogurt to celebrate life. I sat down by myself in front of shop, eating my yogurt while I watched people float passed me over and over again. What are they doing?

*please help me click on the H&M advertisement on top! Thank you~*

CNY

The first 7 day of CNY has just flew by. Did you enjoy yourself? The water dragon hasn't been too kind to the humans. A lot of my loved ones are down with the flu virus. I was coughing so hard my eyes started to tear. The white phlegm in my throat seemed to reproduce itself with no limits and it often choke me up awake in the middle of the night. When I boarded the train, the number of sickly people was simply uncountable. Best of all, these virus are contagious.Good luck people.

I feel the most immune to these viruses when I already have them in my body.

GONG XI FA CAI

Happy New Year, all my babies!

Since the start of the year until today, my days had well been below average. Days before 23 January, I was already trying hard to contain and treat the virus trapped inside my body. It was difficult, because they won't go away unless they meet the world with a big bang. So, despite my best effort, my throat is now enjoying the company of green phlegm. My body is set to wake me up every morning by involuntary coughing. What to do~

That aside, I was still very excited and eager when Chinese New Year arrived. Last year, my shift work in Resorts World Casino didn't allow me to do any visiting at all. So for the first time in my life, I missed the chance to gather with my relatives and to collect ang baos from them. Darn. Which pretty much explains why I looked forward to this year's CNY. =p

For this year's reunion dinner, I invited Michelle Onni to join me and my family. From her account, she told me that Koreans celebrate CNY as well, but quite differently as Singaporeans. In her country, for three days, the men would eat, drink and chat in a room while the women had the full responsibilities to prepare gourmet for the family. Luckily I have an awesome dad as a cook. Onni couldn't stop complementing on dad's excellent cullinary skills.

While it might seem a little kiasu, I was forced with little option but to do my school work on the very first day of CNY. At the stroke of 12 midnight, I wished my adorable parents happy CNY, gave them hugs and kisses, prayed to my ancestors and had to return to my room to continue working on my assignments. Mid-term breaks are usually like that. They give you "breaks" not to enjoy, but to let you decide the weigh the opportunity cost for enjoying yourself and sacrificing your academic grades. How cunning was that.

Of course, I wouldn't want my grades to slip. I could never balance between family, social and work equally. So, my choice (since young) had always been family, work over social. I am sorry friends! Fortunately, I have understanding family who knows and values my priorities. Nonetheless, I made sure I collected as many ang baos as possible this year before launching full fletch for school.

The thing is, I wouldn't have been so tight about the money if my school fees didn't have to cost me thirty thousand dollars. Instead worrying about not being able to earn enough each month to pay off the installments, I could have be so care-free. I quote the famous Uncle Ben's wise words to Peter Parker in Spider Man,

"With power comes great responsibility".

What to do? *shrugs*

*Photo credits to the great photographers, Davin Tan, Hong Sean, Teacher Brian and David*

Onni

Music has this incredible magic that can connect to people from all over the world. When the right song plays at the right time, the chords can hit you so hard your emotions run uncontrollably. Will this song gives you goosebumps too?

Song of the day: Chasing Cars

By Snow Patrol

 I miss everyone in Grey's Anatomy. I felt like I grew up with them.

***

생일 축하합니다, 언니!!!
<3

Planning

As the famous saying goes, "If you fail to plan, you plan to fail."

While time may still be moving at per second rate, we may soon realize that we do not have the luxury to dive into our comfortable couch, take in a sip of coffee and watch the world goes by as we ponder where do humans come from or the complexities of the universe. In today's context (at least to me), time is traveling at a speed which is equivalent to the speed of light at 3 x 10 to the power of 8. It is thus, mandatory to plan ahead, be it a year, a month, or simply a day.

Since young, my form teacher in Primary school has long spotted the systematic character in me. How did I know that? Well, she wrote it in my report book. It has been a personal trait that I am proud and relieved to be pretty good at. Now that I have more things to do than ever, planning has helped me to set down my tasks clearly, enabling me to complete my assignments on time.

While I may tend to derail from my plan, sometimes, I will still encourage you to draw out your own timetable and schedule your tasks. It is always better to have something to fall back and rely on.

Now if you may excuse me, I am going to join my Baby Rabbit on the bed. She has some questions on the metaphysics for me.

*Have you helped me clicked on the banner link on top yet? ;)*

Song of the day: Chasing Pavements

By Adele

Suay

Unfortunately, 2012 hasn't been too kind to me. One of my new year resolutions were to fix the dams in my eyes and reduce the frequency of floods streaming down my face. Who knows, I teared 4 times yesterday. FOUR freaking times within a 5-hour period. I have even broken my own record for the highest volume and worst tsunami ever in my entire 23 years of living. Gosh.

Yesterday, I trapped my own finger when I was closing M's car door from the outside. I pulled out my finger on reflex and use the other hand to wrapped around the injured finger. I didn't cry at the time. I was looking for M, who was ignorant to my fatal accident and was happily tearing his car park coupon in the car. I couldn't open the door because my other hand was busy trying to "cure" my finger. My hands were paralyzed. After what seemed to be a century later, the boy finally realized I was missing from the car and came out to look for me. When a child fell, he or she wouldn't cry until she realized someone was looking at her. Just like a child, my faulty dams gave way the moment our sights connected. 

We went for a movie produced by Jack Neo called "We Not Naughty". He always dedicate an extremely large portion of his movies for product display. I wouldn't blame him though. Making a movie is indeed costly, and advertisers provide grants that are useful for him. Apart from that, he likes to include the theme on kinships on his movies as well. Be it mother and son pair or mother and daughter pair. Homo sapiens are emotional mammals. Our feelings are intricate. When I saw the mother and daughter pair hugging and crying together, tsunami #2 strikes again. The boyfriend was very delighted to count and remind me the number of times that I have teared.

Today, I met my parents for dinner and I strategically picked a seat with a great view to the television without having tornado blowing at my hair all the time. My parents offered and suggested me to sit on a particular side because they thought it was the best seat for me. While we were enjoying our meal, I heard the sound of glass bottle smashing against the floor and breaking into small little pieces. I thought Stone Cold Steve Austin was coming out from somewhere. But no, I realised a man from the table next to ours had dropped his bottle accidentally. The corpse of the bottle was all over the floor. Within the next second, I felt a prickly pain on my lower leg. I looked down and found the killer weapon lying on the floor. Blood was oozing out from my leg.

SUAY LAH!

But I am relieved that my parents were fine. If I didn't take that seat, either of my parents would have been the person being cut by flying glass. Albeit just a small cut, I wouldn't want them to be hurt in any ways.

How? Does anyone has a solution to help me change my luck around?

Song of the day: Built to Last

By Melee